I have recently noticed a trend in Social Media, and that is the rise of the bare minimum. What I am talking about is that time after time again, I see pictures of men cooking dinner, or braiding their girlfriend’s hair, and getting INSANE amount of praise for it.
“UGH LITERAL RELATIONSHIP GOALS 🔥🔥🔥” comments Jessica on a screenshot of a guy saying "don't be sad baby" in a text message
“WOW he’s legit perfect #boyfriendgoals” comments Ashley on a picture of a man chopping an onion for dinner.
I used to think that the people commenting these things were just interested in a relationship, but recently I’ve realized that almost no one has any idea of what romance entails anymore. Gone are the days of courting each other, here are the days of doing the bare minimum. And I’m not saying that all relationships suck and no one is romantic, but our standards of romance have changed, down to the point where it doesn’t even really exist anymore. Romance is dead, and we killed it.
So what brought on this sudden cease and desist on romance? As time has passed, and the heartbreaks came over and over again, did we just unintentionally condition ourselves to expect the least? I think, that at the root of it, my generation has made dating such a casual feat that we no longer think that monogamous commitment is the norm. Thanks to dating apps such as Tinder or Bumble, the next best thing could just be a swipe away, so why waste time on just one someone? Empty gestures, such as a reasonably timed text back and a like on instagram make our hearts flutter like we were just proposed to, but why? We're so worried about seeming clingy due to this casual dating mess that we forget to express how we really feel. In a culture where we can even get men at the swipe of a screen, I can't help but wonder: do we see romance as an inconvenience, or is it just an out-dated practice?
Romance doesn’t have to be a room filled with rose petals and candles, romance is based on each specific person. I have a friend who absolutely loves wine, so her boyfriend bought a couple of bottles of wine and set up a fake wine tasting at home for her. For another person, romance could be something totally different. My point is, I think we get so wrapped up in our own lives that sometimes we forget how important it is to incorporate something that makes our significant others feel special, or how to win over a new person to date. Anyone can cook dinner, but not everyone can set up a candlelit table with some French wine, soft music, and their partner’s favorite dish. Romance is about making things special.
All of this makes me wonder, why are so many people committed to hate Valentine’s Day? Each year, I see more and more people complaining about the capitalist tradition that is made to profit from this holiday. But in these times, with all the negativity and hatred floating around, I think we should be embracing love, and if a day celebrating love is what it takes for some people to be romantic, then so be it.