You've seen it on Friends, Sex and the City, How I Met Your Mother and Parks and Recs. Best friends, always around each other, sharing all of their ups and downs, always meeting for cosmos or coffee at all hours of the day. But in real life, as I'm approaching 25, I find that I spend most of my time alone or with my boyfriend, and no matter how many people I meet or how many times I go on Bumble BFF to swipe, I find that my best friends are all scattered or impossible to make plans with. Which leaves me to ask, what the hell is up? I text most of my friends every week, sometimes FaceTime them, and we try to fly out to see each other. We all make the effort, but somehow life does not leave us with a Carrie and Co. friendship circle.
I think that we all crave intimacy, but somehow fail to achieve it due to the unavoidable changes in life. People move, people get more demanding jobs, and we are left binge-watching friends, wishing that our own joey and Chandler walk in for breakfast. I hate to be one of those people, but I truly think that social media and Netflix (I'm guilty of this for sure) have caused us to disconnect from intimacy with people. Somehow, spilling your guts over instagram DM is just not the same as venting in person.
However, I have found that I'm learning to put in some more effort into my current friendships, and vice versa. One of my longest friends (we've known each other for a DECADE!) is coming to visit me for spring break, another best friend and I try to call each other once a week to catch up. We should stop focusing on these clearly unattainable friendships- theres not enough hours in the week to go to work, get cosmos with Samantha, workout with Charlotte, and have some chatting time with Miranda, along with having some time for your own time; and rarely do all of your best friends live in the same building. But we can focus on being more sincere, less selfish, and focus on what we have here in front of us. Take the time to reach out, schedule a game night, call your BFF in California. After all, they're your best friends.